Back when I was a teenager and living with my family, I was nothing like the rather peaceful, joyful Halina you see now. I was in a more or less constant state of frustration and conflict. All I wanted was to be alone, to be free and to do what I wanted. But I couldn’t.
I came to think of it as I was walking yesterday. Wondering how many people feel like this during the lock-down, having to spend more time together than they would want to, on less space than they need. Not being able to be yourself completely, not being able to work the way you want to or need to.
It’s a complex situation to be in, and it doesn’t make it any easier that you are a sensitive human being. You need peace and time and space do the work you’re here to do.
But how? We tend to believe that if only we understand the situation and the underlying patterns, if only we can find out what causes the frustration and the conflict, then we can fix it, and then there will be peace. So that’s what we try to do.
Surely, understanding and insights can bring you some peace of mind, for a while. But it doesn’t bring you peace of heart. Because your heart doesn’t seek understanding. Your heart seeks its nature. And the nature of your heart is love. Love and freedom.
But love doesn’t come from understanding. It comes as an inner connection. It comes as alignment and attunement and allowing. It comes as coming back to your heart’s innate peace and joy.
It sounds simple, but when your buttons are being triggered, when you are being met with the un-peacefulness within and outside, love is hard to find.
For the first 40 years of my life it has been as hard for me as for anyone else. Then, through a series of spontaneous awakenings I was shown a way to connect with love and peace even when I didn’t feel love and peace at all. A way so simple and so powerful that it blew my mind.
And my mind needed to blown! Because, as the good old songs goes, all we need is love. Love rather than understanding.
All we need is to SEE through the eyes of love.
This is one of the reason I call it the SEE Approach. It’s also an abbreviation of the 3 simple steps that make it work. More about SEEing here.
Yesterday I participated in the MayDay meditation 2020. It was fascinating, unexpected and eye-opening (literally and figuratively speaking) – and it turned in a bit of a leadership meditation for me.
From the very beginning, I felt a collective energy n the space (beyond space) that was so beautiful, so loving, so connecting… 🙏
Leadership meditation – the emerging of it
Meanwhile, with the streamed event there were some audio issues. I’m totally fine with that. Life happens…
The fascinating part? How the comments were rolling fast, not only saying “What’s wrong with the audio?” but also “Never mind the audio, let’s just meditate!”. The secret leadership meditation had began… 😊
And that beautiful energy just there, filling the invisible sky…
Meanwhile, the streamed event turned out to consist of a long line of presentations, invitations and inspiration from our world’s best known spiritual leaders and organizations and artists….
The fascinating part? How the comments kept rolling fast saying “This is inspiring” but also “These people are great but I thought we were to meditate?”.
That’s how I felt you and you know… Eventually, I decided to stay true to what felt right. I turned off the audio, left the live stream to itself, and allowed myself to do what my entire being wanted to…
And it wasn’t even my typical way of meditation: it was pure beingness with open senses (eyes too), being with the omnipresence of the collective energy, with an experience of intimate connection with Source, no longer individual…
So beautiful!… It felt like New Year. Maybe it really was.
Afterwards, I found myself wondering and pondering what was happening.
A leadership meditation – the questions
What is leadership, really? Because we are all leaders. In our own lives, and as coaches also leaders for our clients and tribes.
We are leaders but what is leading us?
Are we leading the ways we have learned? Or are we listening to those that we are called to lead?
Is leading always to speak and lecture and inspire? Or could it be, sometimes, as Lao Tse Tung would say it, to listen and to follow? And what does it mean?
Halina here, from the Joy Keepers Network and Awakening to Joyful Living. I’m back. 🙂 You probably haven’t noticed that I was away because Facebook will always keep us satisfied… But I noticed that I haven’t been posting here anything for a couple of weeks. And the reason for that was that I was somewhere else…. Listen on – or read the transcript below.
Our Inner Connection created an experience of sharing a physical space
Actually, I was in this physical room and it felt like I was somewhere else. I was behind this camera, this computer, and it felt as if it somehow led me into a big big space with 500+ other people from all over the world, meeting in the same place. Which we know is not possible these days because of Corona and closed borders, etc, etc. Nevertheless, this is how it felt.
It felt like this for me and it felt like this for many others, maybe for most of those who participated. It felt magical, as if we kind of knew where our bodies were but we were so strongly connected that it felt as if we were in the same room. I have never experienced something like that during any online webinar or summit.
Here, it was possible, throughout the entire 6-day experience led by Steinar Ditlefsen, with several speakers and this whole amazing community.
This experience of inner connection transcending the physical and also transcending expectations reminded me of something I experienced many years ago:
Inner Connection creates an experience of love and belonging
Back then, I was really, really lonely. I felt very disconnected from the world. I felt that I didn’t belong. The loneliness was in my personal life and also in all aspects of my life, pretty much, perhaps except of music. Music kept me connected. But otherwise, no.
Very long story short, I eventually found the key to transforming, transcending loneliness and did some intensive inner work around self love, specifically and mostly. And then, magic started to happen!
The magic was that I started feeling connected with myself, and also, with that, I started feeling connected with other people. And so, from an experience where I was feeling lonely – whether I was alone or with other people, whether there was physical contact or not – I started feeling connected.
That feeling has continued ever since, I feel connected regardless of physical distance or not. So, I can be alone for weeks, these days it’s months, and I feel connected, even if there’s no one else in my physical space. I still laugh and enjoy physical meetings and the hugs and experiencing each other in that way, don’t get me wrong. But it is not a need, it is not a lack – because the connection is there. The connection changes everything.
Connection is the key
It made me ponder something else during this week that I experienced during the ETTG week. There were many amazing speakers there. And each of them had their own perspective on the world and their own perspective on how transformation can happen. There were different modalities, different ways of understanding.
They all pointed to the same space, the heart space, where the connection happens. But each of us really has our own system, our own perspective and method and books and courses in the way we coach and teach the transformation. And it was beautiful to see it. It was like watching creativity.
It was like when you see a room full of books – and there’s such a beauty to the fact that there are so many perspectives, so many ways of expressing our humanity and our spirituality. And still, a book only matters when there’s connection between the reader and the author. And the solutions that we bring only matter and only have any significance when there’s connection between us.
It’s like when you think of our climate and environmental and political and social challenges. We have all the solutions we need today. We have much more than we need in terms of solutions. What is lacking still – but it will come – is the connection, the experience of Oneness. Because when that experience is there, then we can use the solutions, then we can create the balanced environment that we need and that our planet needs.
So connection is the key, right? And it’s the inner connections – the connection of the heart. It’s so powerful and it’s so magical. Connection comes first.
How Joy leads to Connection
And this is also why joy is such an amazing and important part of life. There are, again, different ways of talking about it. But right now and many times, what really amazes me about the energy of joy and the experience of joy is that it connects us. When we feel joy, we feel connected.
We feel connected with ourselves, with life, with God, with nature, with each other. When we feel joy, the connection with other people becomes so strong that we resonate – other people feel that joy too. This is why joy matters. It connects us, it brings us back to the unity that is our essence, it brings us back to our wholeness.
So, this is why I have a very special sense of gratitude towards Steinar Ditlefsen, who led the event last week. Because, in a way, he’s the only one – he has his own modalities and mastery in his line of work around speaking and teaching and business also… But throughout an event like the ETTG, he invites people with different perspectives and he helps them and he helps everyone that is there connect. He brings the very key to a door, he opens the door. He supports and invites everyone to connect. And he sees the connection in everyone. So, a special thank you to you, Steinar for that. And a special thank you to everyone for connecting, for being here.
A question for you
And now, to bring it a little bit down to earth, I’m curious. Have you ever had any experiences where you had this inner connection? Perhaps between you and another human being or a group of people? Where it was not through internet, it was not something measurable or tangible – and that connection created something? Maybe it created a change or maybe it created a special experience? Have you had this experience of magical connections in your life? If you had, I would love, love, love to hear about it. So, share in a comment.
Thank you for connecting and I look forward to keep connecting in the future!
There are more and more people these days seeing the corona crisis as healing. It’s about healing hands not just washing hands. Here are my perspectives and stories from this particular journey…
How are you?
In these corona times this is a question with an extra significance somehow. There is pressure around it and it is what we all talk about. And my inclination actually this morning was not talk about it because everyone else is talking about it. …
There is a need for our healing hands
But then I’m not going to talk about it. It’s not about it, it’s about us, it’s about you and me. It’s about how we react during these times too. How we prevail. How we bring in our love, our light, our joy, our healing hands into it all.
And it all looks different for each and everyone of us. It really strikes me how different the world is being experienced. It’s like there is a wave moving through the world and each of us reacts in a different way, depending on our circumstances for sure, but also depending on our inner circumstances. And maybe also just depending on where life takes us these days.
I have such strong and powerful experience that this is so not random, that we are really being invited to bring something into this situation and it may be different for each and everyone of us what it is.
Different challenges – different opportunities to heal
Some will and do experience great pressure, perhaps in terms of health, perhaps in terms of experiencing death in families. For most that’s actually not the case but for some it is. For most there is pressure created in life as we know it. There is more financial pressure perhaps, or pressure in relationships. Some people are forced to be with other people all the time in their homes and apartments. Other people experience loneliness. So it’s very different for each of us.
In any case we are invited to heal ourselves, to discover our self healing hands so to speak. My dear speaking mentor, teaching mentor and colleague Steinar Ditlefsen expressed it with such clarity, just in 5 minutes, how it is all about healing ourselves first, and becoming first what needs to become during this time.
Because as we heal the world heals. That’s how it works. This is a mirror. Whatever we see out there is a mirror for us.
It is a friendly mirror. Sometimes it looks scary but it’s actually a friendly mirror inviting us to heal from within what we see outside. So this is the first thing to do for all of us.
We are more than this
The other thing to do is to remember that we are more than that. We are more than the pressure, we are more than the trouble, we are more than the limitation, we are more than the challenges.
We are infinitely more. We are infinite beings showing up as these human beings, moving through a great challenges. And the great challenge is actually what happens on Earth, it is the climate, the environment and not the corona crisis itself.
It’s not about corona
I talked with a friend yesterday and she said that within the last week or so she’s been talking with some 200 people, and except of one, just one, all the others had the realization that this whole thing with the corona virus is created for us to wake up to our responsibility. And to wake up to our abilities as people who can connect with who we really are, and connect with each other, and work together and collaborate. Because this is really what is being called for.
And they all said to her, “You know once this thing is over… And maybe even before it… I’m going to engage much more around climate and environment. ” They really see how it is important.
We do experience during these times how the pressure that we create in the world as humans how it lessens actually, because we stay at home. You can almost here the sigh of relief in nature.
Can you feel that? I feel it almost literally whenever I go for a walk. Like there’s something opening up. And yes, it’s Spring and the birds are singing but it feels like more than ever before. I’ve heard of others having this experience.
So there is a bigger context for us people, as humanity, as individuals, and also as souls. It is very much about bringing that bigger perspective in, it is very much about surrendering to what life gives us and healing what needs to be healed. Finding our healing hands, literally and figuratively speaking.
Joy and Playfulness in corona times
It is also about bringing even more of our love in, bringing even more of our joy in, bringing even more of our playfulness in. Playfulness as in playing fully.
And how do you play fully when you are under limited circumstances? The reminder is that while some circumstances appear limiting – and I don’t’ want to underestimate those – but our ability to be in joy, our ability to play, our ability to shine is not dependent on our circumstances. It never has been.
No matter how serious things look it doesn’t mean that you should turn that ability down, on the contrary. You can! And I’m here to help you with that, so if you have any questions, if you don’t know how, let me know.
I’m reminded all of a sudden… 25+ years ago my dear dear brother passed away very suddenly, leaving behind his 6 children. I went to Israel where the funeral was to be within very short time, because that’s how they do it. And so I spent time with his family that was in such deep grief, such deep loss…
And the children.. The youngest was just 1 year old, the oldest was a teenager I think. What I really noticed was how they moved through waves… There were times where they were grieving and crying and missing their Dad and also just reacting to the grieving adults around them… But in between that they were playing, they were joyful, they were alive!
This is our natural way of being. And, we live in a culture that may be judging that, that may be saying oh you shouldn’t… But we know we should! And we see it. I’m sure you’ve seen videos from Italy where people are singing and laughing, and there are so many beautiful things going on right now, it makes my heart sing!
Our challenges and our gifts
In meeting a challenge we are really bringing gifts in, we are really bringing our joy, we are really bringing up what we are, which is more than the circumstances, and more than the challenges. It’s so wonderful to see that.
So let’s keep doing it, let’s keep shining. This is our role. I’ve seen that some of us had this very strange experience: As soon as this thing began to accelerate there was a great peace, great love, great joy flowing into us and through us. And it is there for a reason. It is there because this is the role we are here to play.
We are here to be that peace, to be that joy. So if that happens for you wonderful, be grateful, and share it. Let’s shine! This is what we’re here for.
If you don’t experience the shining that’s totally fine. Then you’re here to heal it right now. And the shining will come. Because the only thing between the shining and the not shining is what needs to be addressed at this time. We experience it for a reason.
This is the time to be a Joy Keeper in whatever way you are that. And Love Keeper and Light Keeper and Hope Keeper. Be the healing hands of the world.
I think this is very important actually. I’ve heard a lady who for the best of reasons and with the best intentions said ”This is the worst crisis in the history of humanity” and she said it with such gravity. And I don’t want to underestimate what is going on, especially because I cannot see into the future. But I do know and I do see and I am being told and others are too, that this is a wave that is going pass and it is not the worst crisis in the history of human.
It is a serious crisis yet in the big scheme of things it is actually minor. And I am not underestimating it, please don’t take me wrong. I’m not underestimating the pain, or the suffering, or the trouble. Still, this is not the end of the world, this is a passing wave.
The invitation as always is to do what we need to do, to heal ourselves first and then we heal the world. To shine within and then to shine outside. To find the joy and the playfulness in whatever way we can right now and then to bring it out. And the world moves and life moves on.
Thank you! Thank you so much. Be Joy because you are. Be Love because you are.
And you will find it, even if you cannot come in touch with it right now, which may be true for some of you, you will find it and we are here to help each other with that. We are waking up to this together.
There is support around you for sure. And I’m here for you as well so just let me know.
Thank you for listening, thank you for being here.
Is it better to choose love rather than fear, joy rather than sadness, light rather than dark? The answer seems obvious. Yet there comes a time when we are called to move beyond these choices….
Our joy and freedom is in our wholeness. Love and joy don’t choose. Are we willing to learn to embrace rather than evade?
I will be sharing more specific resources to support this journey. Stay in touch through the Awakening To Joy newsletter at HalinaGold.com/welcome (you will get it as well as the “Finding Joy Every Day” ebook).
Or, if you feel you’re ready to move to that next level of freedom and joy, I’m ready to support you here.
First, a disclaimer: I am not an ambitious, driven personality as such. 🙂 So when I speak about the next level and getting there it’s not about that. Rather, it’s about the journey to the next level of freedom, of joy, of your life’s work, of a relationship perhaps – whatever matters to you. And there’s a paradox there… Listen in…
Below are some key points from the video:
Getting to the next level is not like climbing the steps of a ladder. Rather, it’s a spiral- like unfoldment.
So how do we get to the next level?
There is a paradox there, because the person that we will become at the next level sees things from a more expansive perspective than the person asking the question, so how can the one asking know how to get there? Based on experience! And the experience is… Well, there we have another paradox:
The movement towards the next level is happening as we stay where we are. In other words, as we are fully present in this moment, receiving the full gift of the here and now
Eckhart Tolle speaks of our tendency to trade the present movement for some future moment. Yet there is no better, more fulfilling experience than that of being present here and now.
And even if the next level can, by its nature, feel more expansive, joyful, fulfilling… It can only happen through our presence there – which starts with our presence here!
The good news (well, it’s all good news really…), but the really good news 🙂 is that there was a time where we knew exactly how to do this. We were born as the masters of growth!
Children are masters of reaching the next level, being fully present while growing and building like no one else can.
They and we know, instinctively, that the art of growing lies in the being fully here and now. And then things unfold, not because we need them to but because we are savoring the perfect magic of here and now.
Of course, what we have to be present to here and now and what we grow and build these days is so much more than sand slots… This is not for the faint of heart, as they say. 🙂 If you feel you need or want support for your journey, here are some options
Many of us are in transition – something is ending, something new is coming but is only at its very beginning or perhaps not even that. And there is a theme there, about fulfillment of needs – not having our needs fulfilled. Behind the theme there is a much bigger calling to have our needs fulfilled in ways we didn’t even know where possible. The invitation is to take the next step, whatever that is for you.
Below are a few key points from the video. Watch the video to get the benefit of the energy, the deeper insights and real life examples. Also, please note that what is shared here is not about perfection, or what’s right or wrong, it’s about exploring what is going on in our lives at this time (wherever we are on our awakening journey) and what the real potential is there.
The fulfillment of our needs is absolutely necessary. But how? The paradigm of our current culture is that needs (for love, for money, or anything else) have to be fulfilled by someone or something external.
Living with and believing that paradigm makes us completely dependent on the limited resources of other people, work, nature etc. It makes us feel limited and unfulfilled, more or less.
Through a great deal of our life that’s just how it is and we have no other choice than to seek fulfillment through other people, external work etc.
But at some point we realize that behind the pain, the frustrations or just dissatisfaction due to unfulfilled needs there is a bigger calling and a bigger potential: To experience an actual fulfillment through our wholeness.
It doesn’t mean that we stop relating to other people, or stop work or stop receiving resources from nature. But it does mean that all our relationships with everyone and everything outside ourselves can begin to change.
We discover that there is necessity for knowing our wholeness and oneness and meeting the world from there.
Instead of seeking love from a space of lack we can share our presence and experience more love together. Instead of seeking money from a space of lack we can serve from our abundance and experience more abundance together. Instead of seeking natural resources from a space of lack we can experience a rich and lasting relationship with the Earth.
Our orientation towards the world can change from getting our needs fulfilled to following the flow of life, being more present and then sharing from a place of more wholeness and less lack.
Again, we are all in a process, we’re learning. Sometimes we have no choice but seeking fulfillment of needs outside and that is fine. But sometimes we do have a choice and are reminded of the potential of seeking within first. And when we do we get a chance to find the joy, beauty, the love, the expansion, the abundance in ways that we didn’t even imagine where possible.
And then, whatever we find outside is on top of the inner fulfillment and it’s just so sweet and beautiful. But we’re not longer dependent and that means that we can now see and enJOY so many more dimensions in ourselves and in others.
There are many ways of finding joy in life. Strangely, the most powerful ones are actually those we tend to avoid. And there is a reason for that…
Finding joy in life requires that the inner energy of joy flows higher and richer. But that is only possible if we create more space for it to flow! Here are 2 fundamental ways to make it create that space:
Create more time for joy in your daily rhythm
Create more space for joy in your energy flow
Why finding joy in life can be hard
Creating more space for the joy energy to flow means addressing whatever takes that space now but is not flowing. It takes resolving energy blocks in other ways.
More often than not these energy blocks, or joy blocks, relate to our core wounds, our issues, our themes.
The challenge – which I have seen in my work with clients and also in my own life – is that we are reluctant to go there!
Many if not most of you reading this have already spent quite some time and energy addressing these issues. If you’re like most people, you prefer to believe that you have done the work already and there’s no need to go back there. Who wants to experience that pain again… But here’s the inconvenient truth:
When we refuse to go deeper we prevent ourselves from reaching higher levels of joy, in all areas of life
The thing is that there is always a deeper level of understanding and a deeper level of healing. Not going that next step deeper will simply prevent you from freeing the energy, the potential, the free space for your joy to flow. And that again will prevent you from experiencing that next level of freedom, of love, of joy, of creativity, of true fulfillment.
Every time you dare to dive deeper, you open up to more gifts, including powerful and wonderful gifts you didn’t even know were waiting for you!
Ready to dive deeper and find your next level of joy? Consider this:
As life always happens for you, it provides you with two ways to go deeper
You experience a reflection in the world that shows where you may be stuck or judging yourself. You can choose to work with that in conscious and freeing ways that most people aren’t aware of, actually.
Don’t let the immediate comfort of not addressing those issues stop you from experiencing the far more fulfilling joy, love and freedom that is your birthright!
Is it possible to meet an unpleasant experience of “weirdness” and even turn criticism to freedom and joy?
When we open to an aspect of ourselves that we have been out of touch with for many years it can be experienced as very uncomfortable. It may take some work before we can SEE the gift in the experience.
We have so many ideas about what is the truth about us or not, and especially when it comes to what we experience as discomfort and even more so criticism, our natural reaction is to defend ourselves.
It doesn’t help us much though, not in the long run. Defensiveness constricts our heart and our energy, and with that prevents us from SEEing what is there to see, and uncovering the hidden potential and joy that is there too.
Whereas saying yes to criticism, as challenging and even counter-intuitive as it may seem, and doing it in an open sort of way yet without self-judgement does the opposite: It expands our energy, enables flow, and opens for a deeper experience of the beauty of our wholeness!
Turn criticism to freedom – an invitation to a bold practice
When meeting criticism, try to say yes to whatever is being said about you as a part of you, an aspect of you. An aspect that you are willing to SEE and explore, a part of your wholeness, and from there a part of our Oneness. There you have the potential to go from criticism to freedom and joy. And…