Leadership meditation – the emerging of it
A leadership meditation – the questions
How is the invitation to lead in new ways showing in your life?
How is the invitation to lead in new ways showing in your life?
Let’s talk about our Inner Connection….
Halina here, from the Joy Keepers Network and Awakening to Joyful Living. I’m back. 🙂 You probably haven’t noticed that I was away because Facebook will always keep us satisfied… But I noticed that I haven’t been posting here anything for a couple of weeks. And the reason for that was that I was somewhere else…. Listen on – or read the transcript below.
Actually, I was in this physical room and it felt like I was somewhere else. I was behind this camera, this computer, and it felt as if it somehow led me into a big big space with 500+ other people from all over the world, meeting in the same place. Which we know is not possible these days because of Corona and closed borders, etc, etc. Nevertheless, this is how it felt.
It felt like this for me and it felt like this for many others, maybe for most of those who participated. It felt magical, as if we kind of knew where our bodies were but we were so strongly connected that it felt as if we were in the same room. I have never experienced something like that during any online webinar or summit.
Here, it was possible, throughout the entire 6-day experience led by Steinar Ditlefsen, with several speakers and this whole amazing community.
This experience of inner connection transcending the physical and also transcending expectations reminded me of something I experienced many years ago:
Back then, I was really, really lonely. I felt very disconnected from the world. I felt that I didn’t belong. The loneliness was in my personal life and also in all aspects of my life, pretty much, perhaps except of music. Music kept me connected. But otherwise, no.
Very long story short, I eventually found the key to transforming, transcending loneliness and did some intensive inner work around self love, specifically and mostly. And then, magic started to happen!
The magic was that I started feeling connected with myself, and also, with that, I started feeling connected with other people. And so, from an experience where I was feeling lonely – whether I was alone or with other people, whether there was physical contact or not – I started feeling connected.
That feeling has continued ever since, I feel connected regardless of physical distance or not. So, I can be alone for weeks, these days it’s months, and I feel connected, even if there’s no one else in my physical space. I still laugh and enjoy physical meetings and the hugs and experiencing each other in that way, don’t get me wrong. But it is not a need, it is not a lack – because the connection is there. The connection changes everything.
It made me ponder something else during this week that I experienced during the ETTG week. There were many amazing speakers there. And each of them had their own perspective on the world and their own perspective on how transformation can happen. There were different modalities, different ways of understanding.
They all pointed to the same space, the heart space, where the connection happens. But each of us really has our own system, our own perspective and method and books and courses in the way we coach and teach the transformation. And it was beautiful to see it. It was like watching creativity.
It was like when you see a room full of books – and there’s such a beauty to the fact that there are so many perspectives, so many ways of expressing our humanity and our spirituality. And still, a book only matters when there’s connection between the reader and the author. And the solutions that we bring only matter and only have any significance when there’s connection between us.
It’s like when you think of our climate and environmental and political and social challenges. We have all the solutions we need today. We have much more than we need in terms of solutions. What is lacking still – but it will come – is the connection, the experience of Oneness. Because when that experience is there, then we can use the solutions, then we can create the balanced environment that we need and that our planet needs.
So connection is the key, right? And it’s the inner connections – the connection of the heart. It’s so powerful and it’s so magical. Connection comes first.
And this is also why joy is such an amazing and important part of life. There are, again, different ways of talking about it. But right now and many times, what really amazes me about the energy of joy and the experience of joy is that it connects us. When we feel joy, we feel connected.
We feel connected with ourselves, with life, with God, with nature, with each other. When we feel joy, the connection with other people becomes so strong that we resonate – other people feel that joy too. This is why joy matters. It connects us, it brings us back to the unity that is our essence, it brings us back to our wholeness.
So, this is why I have a very special sense of gratitude towards Steinar Ditlefsen, who led the event last week. Because, in a way, he’s the only one – he has his own modalities and mastery in his line of work around speaking and teaching and business also… But throughout an event like the ETTG, he invites people with different perspectives and he helps them and he helps everyone that is there connect. He brings the very key to a door, he opens the door. He supports and invites everyone to connect. And he sees the connection in everyone. So, a special thank you to you, Steinar for that. And a special thank you to everyone for connecting, for being here.
And now, to bring it a little bit down to earth, I’m curious. Have you ever had any experiences where you had this inner connection? Perhaps between you and another human being or a group of people? Where it was not through internet, it was not something measurable or tangible – and that connection created something? Maybe it created a change or maybe it created a special experience? Have you had this experience of magical connections in your life? If you had, I would love, love, love to hear about it. So, share in a comment.
Thank you for connecting and I look forward to keep connecting in the future!
I’m having such an interesting experience these days, of certain things that are visible and are being shared publicly – such as the invitation to raise your vibration. And there are other things that are not share as openly – at least, where I am. And that is very understandable…
As you probably know, I am all about joy. I am all about supporting this community in opening to more joy, in awakening to joyful living, in becoming Joy Keepers. So, whenever I speak of that, I receive some beautiful experiences from people that resonate with that and feel the joy in themselves and in their lives and share that – and that is so wonderful. You are so needed and your ability to stay in joy is so important; now, more than ever! And then…
There are all those who do not comment and do not say anything. And some of them, I meet in a different way. Some of them are my coaching clients, for example. And when we talk, it’s in a more private space – and in that way, a space that feels more safe and so there they share the challenges they experience now. Fear being one of them and probably the most important of them, the biggest of them. And so, we work with that.
But what they also share with me is that they feel a relief because we can talk about it. The thing is that there is something going on, at least on the surface of the spiritual community, which is big, it’s millions of people, right? But let’s just call it a community. There’s something going on there that can give us a false perception perhaps. And what is going on is that, for the best of reasons, there is so much invitation to stay in the high vibration: “Don’t give in to fear”, “Don’t give in to suffering and such, but raise your vibration and connect with God” – and all those beautiful and true statements are there… However, this is not how life works!
So, many people experience right now – people in the spiritual community, people who are themselves coaches and practitioners and healers or speakers, teachers – they experience fear. You experience fear. And then, you have all these messages that you’re not supposed to be there, you’re supposed to be somewhere else. And perhaps, it speaks to part of your belief system even.
And so, you try to “raise your vibration” but you can’t. And then you feel really defeated, perhaps because your spiritual direction and journey tells you, “I should not be in fear. I should be able to raise vibration. I should be in joy. I should be centered. I should meditate”, etc, etc, etc. And at the same time, perhaps you feel that you can’t.
Perhaps you experience that your life is falling apart. Perhaps you experience that people that you care deeply about, your loved ones are sick or maybe you hear of people that pass away and it feels like it’s too early – and in any case, it hurts. And you see everything that’s going on in the world and you wonder about what’s going on? What’s going to happen with your financial situations? How are you going to cope?
All this is going on and it puts you under great, great stress and there’s more and more fear. And at the same time, there’s this idea – in the community that should be your support – there’s this idea, not from all, I’m sure, but from certain special leaders saying that you shouldn’t be going there.
So, I’m here to say that yes, you should, and you can, and it doesn’t mean that you will stay there forever. There’s nothing wrong with your life. There’s nothing wrong with moving through fear, moving through despair, moving through doubts, moving through darkness – there’s nothing wrong with that, at all.
On the contrary, we move through suffering as a way of exploring it; of a way of getting to know certain areas of our lives. What happens right now with this whole corona crisis is a global transformation. More and more people see it and it’s also a personal transformation.
Well, transformations don’t happen by trying to get away from what is calling for a transformation. They don’t happen by us running away from what is calling for our attention. When there is fear, when there is lack, when there is a loss – this is all something that was there already. And then, life happens and triggers it, but it has lived within us already. So basically, we are being invited to look at it and move through it. And if needed, get some help so that you can move through it.
But it is not about jumping into high vibration. It is about meeting it. And there is nothing wrong with you. There’s nothing wrong with you for a certain period of time, suddenly not being able to do your spiritual practices because you are overwhelmed. You have a good reason not to, there’s too much going on, you’re under stress – that’s one reason.
The other reason, as I see it, is that it actually helps you really dive into it. If you take all your light with you and look at darkness, there is no darkness there. So, you cannot really explore it if you’re fully connected. You actually need to disconnect in order to see that part of you. Does that make sense? I hope it does, because this is how it works.
There are periods of our lives where we are being disconnected from our source to certain degree so that we can experience the pain that has lived in that pocket and that has been seeking our attention. And now it has found our attention. And now, it’s time to to deal with it, to work with it and there are different ways of working with it. You’re not going to stay there. And as you move through it – and there different ways you can move through it – then you can slowly but surely – through patience, through work, through honesty with yourself – you can raise your vibration which is your true nature, but not as an escape from what is there, on the country.
So, I really want to be this voice for you – for those of you who don’t say anything in comments because perhaps you feel that this is embarrassing or you should be more enlightened or you should be more together or you shouldn’t be afraid or you shouldn’t be desperate or shouldn’t be confused. Everything you are is fine.
This is the experience right now. This is the experience right now and it will not last, it will not last. But it is to be experienced and there’s nothing wrong with it and it doesn’t make you any little bit less spiritual than you are because, of course, you are.
And you will be moving through it and I hope you will reach out for help. If I can be of help – and I can, many times – reach out, we’ll find a way to make it happen. And if others can be of help, reach out to them. Get all the help that you need.
Move through it with patience, with dedication, with surrender towards it and you will be okay. You will come out at the other side as we all will, as humanity, as this one percent culture that it experiencing great challenges all of a sudden. And as a world, we will come on the other side of it.
We will learn and we will return on a higher level but not by suppressing anything and not by hiding anything. So, know that: that there is nothing wrong with you. You are on your way. And however the landscape looks right now, this is how it looks and you’re moving through it and you are not alone. Okay? I love you and I look forward to keep connecting with you.
Is it possible to speak of and feel abundance in times of corona, with all the financial pressures and signs of disaster above us? Yes it is! But first, let me ask you….
I really mean the question… How are you?
Here we are on this beautiful morning here in Denmark. The sun is shining brightly and it’s peaceful and all is good… Until I open any app, any social media page, anything… and of course it’s all about the corona virus. Which is completely understandable as corona it is defining our world right now – or so it looks, so it seems.
In strange ways, it is actually not affecting my life, at all. I feel very blessed – or maybe ‘spared’ would be the word? I’m grateful to have the life I have – it’s peace in every way. And I also know it may be very, very different for you.
And so I’m simply curious, human to human curious:
How is your life right now?
How does it look?
How does it feel?
How do you experience it?
I would love you to share in a comment and let me know so that I know how your world is. (If you’re not comfortable sharing in a comment how your life is for you right now, send me a message perhaps? )
What is good in your world?
What is difficult in your world?
How has life changed?
For most people, it has changed into something more limited. And so…
There’s a lot of uncertainty, in so many ways. And in my own simple life and in my certainty, I am definitely seeing that other part too. I’m seeing the world changing rapidly, everything changing… and I’m reminded of a quote that says, ‘In this world, nothing can be said to be certain except death and taxes”. Wow…
It’s kind of true, right? And the feeling behind that is that most people don’t want to have anything to do with either!
We don’t want death, we don’t want taxes, we don’t want life to end, ever, we want to have money flowing, we don’t want taxes…
It’s really all about fear and about our sense of uncertainty and not having safety.
And this is a very old quote as you know, I’m sure. But our present experience… For many, many people the present experience is that it’s really being like these certain things: death and taxes, death and financial fear are being brought in massively – and we don’t want that.
So, we do everything we can to prevent death from happening – as if we could. And we do everything we can to prevent financial changes or fears. And we can, but maybe not in the ways we think we can. Here’s a way to experience abundance in corona times too.
It’s filling the horizon. Yet, when I paint this picture for you and for myself right now, there’s something missing there, right? There’s something missing…
What is missing is the world within, the undying world within and the abundant world within.
The challenge right now is to continue stepping into that world, continue going back into that world, and finding our direction and our certainty and our safety and our life and our abundance in that inner world.
And then, from there, only from there, meet the world out there, however it unfolds. That is the invitation, right?
There are so many things going on right now, also in positive sense. There are so many meditations and sermons and webinars and positive quotes and everything else going on that even that can become overwhelming. It has been for me actually. And yet, here I come with another video myself 😉 – because some things need to be said again.
So, there’s just a lot of everything. And still, within you, within me, there is this inner place of peace, this inner place of joy, this inner place where we can find our sense of direction in the middle of all the confusion.
There’s the inner abundance that we can feel and say and sense in the midst of all the convincing statements of limitation, this inner life in the midst of all that talk of death – which by the way, is tiny compared to what is going on in the world otherwise, I am noticing that too. As always, what happens in our own backyard is so much more important than what happens in the big world – it’s very understandable.
I wish all of us this remembering that we can always step into the unshakable place within that is at peace.
There are many ways to step into it, I’m sure you have your own. And one of the things that it requires is a certain meditative practice perhaps, or just an inner practice, but it also requires grounding and joy – and that, you can also gain these days from dancing!
Like for example, dancing joy with the group of us that Caroline Hoek has taken an initiative to create. We dance regularly, meeting online and seeing each other, and it’s wonderful, it’s absolutely wonderful.
That too brings you back to yourself, brings you back to your body, brings you back to your aliveness, brings you back to your joy. So, come join us! I hope to see you there.
And I hope to see you in the comments – I would love to know how you’re doing!
Let’s continue living and celebrating this life. We are not defined by our circumstances!
What stops our joy? Most of the time, it’s fear. And much of that fear has something to do with love – and money. Listen in…
I’d like to share something about love and money. Which may seem like a strange thing to talk about. But actually, money is a theme that has been showing up quite a bit in the spiritual world. And it’s something that many people on the spiritual path struggle with greatly, and I have definitely been one of them. But no more! 🙂
This is something I’ve been exploring for a very long time. And right now there is another wave, where I go deeper and deeper.
So what do love and money have in common? This could be an interesting question to explore, but for now, the one thing that I’d like to share is this:
We fear losing love and we fear losing money.
The experience we’re having, maybe not when we think deeply about it, but on the feeling level is that love is something coming from “out there” and we can lose it, that we can lose someone’s love.
And we’re having the same experience with money: we believe it is something coming from the external world and we can lose it.
It’s a very deep fear that affects us in many ways: it affects how we relate to other people, how we relate to wealth and money and how we relate to ourselves.
Yet both these fear are just that: they’re fears and they’re lies. Big lies!
Because the truth is that love comes from within. We are love. This is our essence. So we can share it with another, but it doesn’t really come from them. It comes from within.
And the same is the case with wealth. Our wealth, our abundance is our nature. It comes from within. And then it can show up as physical money or things or physical/external wealth… But it does come from within!
Which by the way means that this whole thing with the Law Of Attraction has kind of unfortunate wording I would say. Because money is not something external that we attract. It’s something that we literally manifest in the dream that we call life.
So these are big thoughts but I actually invite you to play with them:
Whenever you feel it, whenever you become aware that you are fearing losing someone’s love, really go to that feeling and feel it – you can use the SEE Approach for that. And then go back to the knowing that your love comes from within and you can never lose it.
And similarly whenever you fear that you will lose money or that you don’t have enough of it: Feel it, explore that feeling – you can use the SEE Approach for that too – and then go back to the truth: You are abundance. It is your nature.
So play with that… and I would love to know how that unfolds for you, what you find out, what experiences, thought and feelings you encounter!
And then it happens. The things we have heard about and read about happen. And it looks as we saw it described, but it feels differently. Because now we’re not at a distance from it, now it is in the life we live. Some places fires are burning. Some places people are attacking other people. Some places relationships as we knew them are dying.
That which was is falling apart. That which we wait for and know to come, hasn’t appeared yet.
And we are changing too. Somehow, we cannot quite recognize ourselves anymore.
We’re in unknown territory where indecision rules. Which way to turn? What to do? How to be in it for ourselves, and for those we care about, and for the world?
Perhaps the answer is to stay in indecision in a sense. Embrace the pain of the dying. Remember that rebirth is inevitable. And stay in equanimity.
Play the role that you have come here to play. And stay in touch with that which never dies and is never born. Allow the greatness in you to express itself through you now, more than before.
Be the agent of the progress that is taking place. Be the Truth Keeper. Be the Love Keeper. Be the Joy Keeper.
~ ~ ~
Are we awakening or avoiding? Knowing the difference between “spiritual bypass” and actual awakening makes all the difference!
But first a definition according to Wikipedia: “A spiritual bypass or spiritual bypassing is a “tendency to use spiritual ideas and practices to sidestep or avoid facing unresolved emotional issues, psychological wounds, and unfinished developmental tasks”.
I have been wanting to share this for a couple of days now but I was kind of pushing it away and hesitating. I wasn’t sure how to communicate this. I didn’t want to say it in a way that could be misunderstood. But I guess the only way out is through it. So here it goes…
As you may know I have been speaking a lot about joy and awakening, for a long time, and it is one voice among many, many others speaking about the evolution of our times, the human evolution and us as humanity stepping into a higher frequency and higher level of consciousness. Which is wonderful and beautiful, obviously.
And, there are some challenges that come along with that greater expansion, challenges that we may not be aware of. Spiritual bypass is one such challenge
I want to share with you my own experience with that because I don’t want you to think that I’m just preaching what we should and should not do. On the contrary, everything I say is based on my own experience.
I had one such experience quite recently. And it was such a great learning experience, actually.
I spent the first 40 years of my life struggling with loneliness really badly. It was very painful and really difficult. At some point I hit the proverbial rock bottom — and in that moment I actually experienced an awakening. An awakening that didn’t last but an awakening nevertheless that then helped me embark on the next stage of the journey. From there I was able to discover a way of meeting my pain with love and transform it more and more and more (learn more about that experience here)
Eventually, coming from a place where I was struggling with loneliness in spite of doing all kinds of inner work, healing, mediation and therapy and what not, I was able to reach the place where I am today: where there is daily joy and there has been so much expansion… life has become pretty beautiful!
One of the things that I’ve been working with for quite a while in the recent year or so has been attachment. I’ve done some deep work with that. As a result it seems that the core of it, the main part of it I was able to transform. And, I’m still meeting shadows of it.
The way I’ve been experiencing it lately is that, because my access to soul connection, to joy, to love, to light has become so natural… What I have been doing recently and noticing that I do is that when I experience some sort of attachment I then immediately re-balance. In the sense that I immediately go back to the joy and the light, as much as I can. It’s like the natural thing to do, right? You see imbalance and then you go back to balance, again and again…
I’ve been doing it for a little while and then, at some point while speaking about my process with my coach… Because yes I have a coach. Just like I coach coaches, I have a coach too, it’s always helpful! … So, we were talking and what I noticed as I described this for her was that there was a sense of running around in a loop. Imbalance -balance, imbalance – balance, imbalance-balance. On and on… So I started to wonder:
What is this heaviness that keeps taking me out of balance? And then I had an intuition in the form of a phrase that came to me: “The Adjustment Bureau”. At first I thought: “Oh, yes, this is what I’m doing, I’m adjusting all the time”
Re-balancing as spiritual bypass
Now, I don’t know if you’re familiar with the film “The Adjustment Bureau”? it’s a great movie, highly recommended. The story takes place in a world very much like ours, except there’s something there that’s called the Adjustment Bureau. They know upfront that certain actions, certain very simple choices, like whether you turn left or right, meet this person or that person, can have huge consequences on how the human journey continues.
So to avoid negative results, to avoid war, unhappiness, to prevent that people take turns they should not take, because it doesn’t serve them or the world the best, this Adjustment Bureau adjusted people’s actions, quietly and invisibly. In the film there’s a whole story around it… Again, get the movie if you haven’t yet.
What I realized was that this was really what I was doing with myself now! Whenever I see the slightest imbalance I adjust myself, I control myself back into balance, back into light, back into joy. However, I do it so quickly, it has become so easy, that I actually miss the gift of the imbalance. Even if it wasn’t intentional I was using what some call “spiritual bypass”.
This is so important to get!
It is so important to understand that when we have what we may think is a negative experience, or a painful experience, or just an uncomfortable experience…. In my case these were just shadows, it wasn’t deep pain. In other instances, it could have been something much more painful… But when these experiences come to us it’s not a mistake, it’s not some kind of outside force that is acting against us.
It is a gift from life. And the gift is there to be accepted and received.
If we don’t receive it then we will get it again. If I get a gift and I don’t accept it, and, as some people would say, don’t learn the lesson, don’t unpack the gift, don’t see the value and the energy that is there and whatever else is there.. when I reject the gift and jump back into balance (via a “spiritual bypass”), then I get the gift again. Fortunately so!
Knowing that, the better response, the more valuable response is to not to be so quick with jumping into those higher frequencies, and joy and love and light. Instead, stay with that experience, that challenge, that pain, that shadow a little bit longer.
Stay with it, allow yourself to feel it and to accept the gift. And then, as it is being received, as it is being felt, as it is being embraced, then we can bring joy and love and light and all good things in, all those higher frequencies.. And when we do…
When we bring these two worlds, these two types of frequencies together: the challenge, the tension, the separated energy one hand and then the higher frequencies, the flow, the uniting energies on the other hand… When we bring all this together then magic can happen. Then transformation happens. Then we truly receive the gift and can unfold into the higher frequencies with the gift.
That’s very different from just adjusting and going back and forth!
I cannot stress it strongly enough that so many of us, perhaps most of us here, have worked so hard and so much with our challenges, our problems, our pain, our past, our stories that it is very natural at some point of the journey to be really tired of it, and to have this “Oh no, not again!” reaction. That is very human and I understand it completely. So there’s nothing wrong with wanting to move very quickly though it…
And, when I say: “Stay with it a bit longer” that’s exactly what I mean. It doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to stay there for another 10 years. I t doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to go through years of releases and I don’t know what else. It might, I cannot exclude it completely, but in most cases, if you have done a lot of work already it probably won’t take that long.
It just means that there is no need and no help for you in rushing through it.
And just to give you an example of the latter… Well, I’m not even sure if I should share it because that in a sense opens a door to another escape… But on the other hand it’s a good example of how subtle it all is:
As soon as I noticed that I was playing the “The Adjustment Bureau” game with myself, I stopped doing that. Next time I experienced a shadow of attachment, I stayed with it and I allowed myself to feel it.
I then noticed that without me wanting to escape it this time, without me trying to bring in these higher frequencies, it untangled very quickly. It happened within a few days. A whole lot happened which as a result began to bring me into a new state of freedom, one that I have not known before in this life. Maybe I have known it as a baby but not since. And who knows, it can be temporary and I may go back to take another round with it and if I do that’s completely fine, I’m learning my lessons too. But it showed me something else that is also important.
When I’m willing to not run away from pain, when I’m willing to not run away from even the most subtle shadows…because it is actually with the subtle shadows that this gets difficult… When I’m willing to stay with it, then it’s as if my soul and the whole world is saying “Yes! Now she gets it! Now we can help her! Now that she gets it we can make the transformation pretty fast and pretty easy and pretty fantastic.”
But again, this is subtle, so please try to, next time you experience a shadow, a challenge, a pain and your immediate response is “let me jump into positive thinking and joy and love and light”… Stay with it instead, and trust it!
You don’t have to hurry into some sort of escape because your soul, your God, your angels, your world, your whatever you call it, it’s all there with you. We are never in these processes alone! When we do our part the “higher powers” do their part too. And the other way round: They cannot do their part unless we do our part also.
Things can transform but only when we do our part and unwrap our gifts.
For some of you this unwrapping of gifts and staying with the pain may be difficult, or you may not be aware of how to do that and how to bring those higher frequencies in.
I wanted to let you know that the tool that I was given (from within) and have been using for 20+ years and that has brought me through amazing transformation, just with this one tool basically… I have been teaching it to my coaching clients in the past and I also had a course about it at some point but it’s really outdated. So I decided to create a new version of it.
Simple visit the page that I created for it, at Halinagold.com/see. There you can register for the course.
The last thing I want to say is this — and it’s really important:
So many of us have been through a lot of pain. I imagine that you have been too and this is why you’re watching this. By working with it, by meeting it, by moving along your path you have done tremendous work for yourself, for your own well-being, for your own happiness — and also for humanity, and for the world. Because we are all connected. Every time you meet your pain, you meet, in a sense, everyone’s pain. Every time you are willing to embrace your pain with love and light and joy and not escape it, you do the same for humanity. We all learn how to meet our pain, meet our shadows with love and light and peace. And we learn how to transform it, and become the more liberated humanity and become the more free, more liberated, more joyful human being that we are destined to be.
Thank you for being here, for doing what you do, and also for reading this.
No matter how it looks, we’re walking together. Reach out to me if you feel it’s time for you and me to connect as well! 😊❤️
This is a time of transition, and with that a time of limitation. Limitation that I have hard time accepting – it feels so wrong at this mature time of my life. This should be and is a time of harvesting in so many other ways – so why this particular drawback?
My guidance tells me it’s only for a while, it’s a challenge meant to make me grow into a bigger energy, bigger service, bigger life. But even knowing it, the frustration is intense! So I decide to walk it off a bit.
I live in an apartment on 2nd floor and as I open the door and step over the threshold, I see there‘s a tiny bird flying above and around the staircase, obviously frustrated because it cannot find its way out. The main entrance to the house, that door is open and that’s how the bird flew in, and then it flew up of course, that’s what birds do… But somehow it doesn’t understand that in order to get out it needs to fly all the way down again.
So here’s this bird, flying really fast just below the high ceiling, then circling down to the window then back up… and I can see how it just continues doing this. “You need help! But how am I going to help you out??” I say to it, really worried.
I wish it would stop flying and sit by that window. Which by the way is protected by a railing and cannot be opened anyway. But perhaps, I could somehow catch it there? Not that I’ve ever tried to catch a bird…
Miraculously, as if it understands, or maybe just trying to escape from me now, the bird flies in between the bars of the railing and starts jumping back and forth, within the small space between the window and the railing, too narrow for it to take off again. This is my chance!
I speak calming words to it but it doesn’t seem to have any effect, the bird continues moving back and forth, now also trying to avoid my hands. But I am determined. Somehow, I don’t even recall how, everything happens so fast!… But now it’s in my hands.
The bird keeps trying to get out of the cage created by my hands, and I keep begging it “Please, just let me do it, I will help you, just let me do it…”. I have to keep my hands around it really tight so it doesn’t get away, because that would just take it back to the futile circling below the ceiling. I have to be firm and I’m also afraid of breaking something in this tiny, delicate body…
With its life in my hands I’m running down the staircase as fast as I can, until I finally cross the threshold there, but as I open my hands and release this beautiful, little being there is a moment of uncertainty: “Will it fly at all?”
Oh but fly it does, and not just to the next house or tree. It flies higher and higher and higher, into the sky, until I can no longer see it.
There are tears in my eyes, a smile on my face and my heart is overflowing with gratitude. I’m happy for the bird, and amazed at the gift this little angel brought to me. Because, see what happened:
To begin with, this curious creature must have found our backyard and then it wanted to explore the space behind the open door. It didn’t know that it was too small a space for a bird.
I imagine that it couldn’t understand what was happening and why it couldn’t find its way out. And even less why it was caught in an even smaller space between the railing and the window. And finally, completely stuck between a pair of human hands!
And yet, somehow, it was through this utmost frightening limitation that it got released. Into the endless freedom of the skies where it belongs, and where it can choose its ways the way a bird is meant to.
This is what my life is about now, I see that. Moving me through shrinking spaces so that I can be released into the freedom of a bigger sky.
This is not a mistake and it is not the ending. This is a new beginning. This is me – and you, perhaps – crossing the threshold!
PS: If you want to learn how to find Joy even in the midst of limitation, download the Finding Joy e-book here
PPS: The bird pictures above are from not mine and they do not stem from the episode above. I didn’t have the time, the mind nor the intention of taking pictures…
This excerpt of the forthcoming book, Awakening to Joyful Living is published here with permission. All Rights Reserved.
Sometimes, your life purpose will require that you let go of what you actually love doing and are good at. How come? This video explains…
To learn more about stepping into your dharma/life purpose, watch Stephen Cope’s video here.
Share any comments/questions/experiences below!